houston, we have a problem.

hello my joyful friends,

It has been a while.  I missed you all! (hey sis!)  Truth be told, I don’t like to talk when I am not talking about something joyful, positive, fun.  And, as previously discussed, I am prone to “toxic positivity” which, my therapist tells me, is dishonesty.  I am not being honest with you, my joyful friends, if I don’t share all of me.  The good, the bad, and the ugly!

So, my hammertoe, (yes, yes, a previous post, but you’ll have to find it on your own) is actually not so funny after all and is a symptom that my nerves are not talking to my muscles, and now the muscles are going on strike.  I look down at my foot and say, “heel, lift off the floor” and nothing happens.  Not good.  And, my not so friendly new doctor said, it could be permanent.  No joke.  Not funny.  I am afraid and sad.  And, I cry.  I don’t like crying.  I don’t like not being in control.  I don’t like my kids or my friends or anyone else for that matter to see me crying.  I am crying now. 

until we meet again,


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